Self Historicization

Carly here. With an attempt to put myself in our current historical context.
I am 28 years of age. Graduated college during the hardly heard of economic collapse in 2008– angry as a hornet.

Schooling really is watered down and lacking substance.
At my state school it was well known and accepted that the students refused to read text books. Professors had to learn to work around it. Not one of my classmates had high hopes for their future. The cubicle was calling. And, the college years were for celebrating life/ drowning sorrows.

Today, we are sitting in the midst of a square between Uranus in Aries & Pluto in Capricorn. These two planets were conjunct during the height of the sixties.
We could call our current climate a second wave. Which means more are to come.

Everyday I fight addiction. My self Love is on the rise. Still, physical desire is highly honored in this society.

No matter how well I relate to the esoteric world doesn’t change the fact that I’m working my ass off. In a what I refer to as “Argumentative Reality.” Creating what I need to satisfy my needs in this world.

The right attire really helps a person push their agenda at a party. But the right attire never seems to appear. At least in my mind. According to the outside world I get it right every time! All I want is to wear my own individuated uniform– which is much different from the uniform worn by the crowds of individuals“.

Oh! And, I am an “early degree” Capricorn. 9 degrees actually. A point that was given ridiculing attention by the Lord of the Under World for major portions of 2011-12. And, we’re not done visiting that point just yet! 
Nine is a very important number. Think of how the Germans use it. Nein! It marked the painful end before a new beginning could slowly begin. We are here now. Have you noticed? 

As a Super Special Person who is always one step ahead of the game– Pluto provided me an early initiation. The only way he knows how: RAPE

By a man who I knew better than to have as my boyfriend.

I’m too lazy to be an outright radical. Sleeping in the street & protesting do not make much sense to me. Instead, I honor Radical Self Reliance: By  Gardening & pickling. Or, by choosing to be a Figure Model.

My Love Life fits the bill of what’s HOT right now. At the moment it all still feels very hush hush. My intention however is to just Let it Out. All of it. What ever who cares. Right?

This essay reminds me of a most favored quote :

I don’t want to be a product of my environment. I want my environment to be a product of me. – Frank Costelo 


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